No demographic is more creative with the English language than children.
From their mispronunciations to their hilarious descriptors of everyday objects, kid language can be endlessly entertaining. At least their parents tend to think so.
We’ve rounded up 30 tweets from parents about the funny names kids give things. Enjoy!
My 2 year old can say “parasaurolophus”, but he pronounces salami “some-mommy”.
— HotCrossMom (@ChrissySteel3) June 25, 2021
My daughter calls David Grohl’s band the Foo Spiders
— Matt Taylor (@Ascension_Matt) January 17, 2022
Hats off to the waiter that kept a straight face as my 5yo ordered the vagina for lunch instead of the lasagna.
— Professional Worrier (@pro_worrier_) June 22, 2021
Me: So, did you watch Encanto?
4 yr old niece: No, that’s a baby movie. I only watch gwown up movies.
Me: Oh, okay, which one did you watch?
Niece: The Load of the Wings.
— AparnaRC (@Wordesse) February 2, 2022
Toddler calls oatmeal “meatmeal.” We all find this funny and slightly disgusting.
— 🥕Haley Stewart🥕 (@HaleyCarrots) January 2, 2022
My 4 year old keeps yelling “oh middlesticks!” and I am never correcting him
— meghan (@deloisivete) February 23, 2022
Kids mispronouncing things is super adorable but at some point I will have to tell my daughter we don’t put Farmer John cheese on spaghetti.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) June 19, 2020
My 6 y/o is learning about different states, but instead of saying New Hampshire he keeps calling it New Hamster. Now my 4 y/o is whining because I told him we are not getting a hamster & my Dry January ended after 4 days.
— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) January 5, 2022
My toddler calls kombucha “bombucha” and we find it too cute to correct
— cringewifey (@cringewiffy) February 21, 2022
My daughter calls Netflix “Netflakes.”
— Abbi Crutchfield (@curlycomedy) January 1, 2022
me: but I’m tired
2: let’s do a popsicle course!
me: I could handle that
— mom mom mom mom mom (@notmythirdrodeo) January 18, 2022
Couple of new words I learned so far on this vacation… my son calls a loofa a scrubby dubby, and my niece calls gummy bears yummy bears. I’m not even gonna correct them.
— Dad Named Matt 🇺🇸 (@mahnamematt) February 7, 2022
I love when kids rename things. For example, my kids call snacks “nackies” and granola bars “nolas” and homemade meals “do we have anything else to eat”
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) February 11, 2022
I don’t miss tantrums or diapers but I do miss the toddler speech blunders like how my son used to mispronounce bridges.
Once we drove under a bridge and he said, “Mommy a bitch again?”
— Anna Grace (@graceupongracie) June 27, 2018
The toddler calls Maleficent “Elephant” and this needs to happen forever
— Ashley (@ashleythetexan) January 11, 2022
Our toddler calls baby grasshoppers “hop-aways” because that’s what they do when she tries to catch them.
— Stu Donovan (@StuartBDonovan) November 28, 2021
4 year old: Daddy do you have any bat cheese?
Me: Bat cheese?
Me: Bat. Cheese?
4: Yes. Bat cheese.
Me: Why are you asking for… bat cheese?
4: For my car
Me: Ahhhh batteries. You need batteries!
4: Yes bat cheese! 🙄
— threetimedaddy (@threetimedaddy) February 12, 2022
My daughter calls her boots “Bloodstones” and she will NOT BE CORRECTED.
— Christina Evans (@cakevans) November 13, 2021
There has been a crew of roofers working at our house for a few days, and my 6yo refers to them as the “builder mans,” and now I shall hereinafter refer to any handy person as a Builder Man going forward.
— Goldfish and Chicken Nuggets (@gfishandnuggets) September 30, 2021
my toddler calls peppermint chapstick the spicy makeup and I think that’s the funniest thing ever 🤣🤣
— Sami 🖤 (@SamHarveyyyy) February 12, 2022
Our toddler calls cranberries “spicy blueberries” and— honestly? Great description for our fam’s food habits.
— Fe-male/iron-man (@reschetology) November 27, 2021
My toddler calls my boobs ‘boo boos’ which was fine until she told a complete stranger that ‘mummy has a boo boo’ and they asked if it needed kissing better
— Lottie-pop 🍭 (@Lottie_Poppie) November 8, 2021
The toddler calls tenders “big chicken nuggets” and tbh he’s right, we’re just too cowardly to call them on it.
— Alex Botting (@alexbotting) October 21, 2021
You know you’re a millennial mom when your toddler calls dvds “records” the first time he sees them. 🙋🏻♀️
— Marcilyn Gibby, MSc. (@marcilynrebecca) November 12, 2021
My almost-2 year old son calls every animal a ‘meow.’
— Helen Hensell (@hhensell) January 24, 2022
My son calls popcorn, “bubbles” lol
— Nairobi (@ladypalamo) February 22, 2022
The toddler calls the covid swab for testing “the covid lollipop”. Every time she gets tested she smiles and says, “Here comes the covid lollipop!”
— Roxana Daneshjou MD/PhD (@RoxanaDaneshjou) December 19, 2021
Toddler calls m&ms emma emmas and I’m not fixing it
— Rees (@PiecesofRees) January 9, 2022
The toddler calls tofu “toes-food” – and yes, she actually likes it – and I just 🥰🥰🥰
— 𝗗𝗿. 𝗖𝗮𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗻𝗲 𝗕𝘂𝗹𝗸𝗮 (@DrCatherineB) December 3, 2021